I am at a loss to understand why so many Argentine tango teachers insist that, “We don’t share weight; we don’t offer resistance; we are each independent movers.”
If that’s so, we might as well be dancing solo. (Which, by the way, is one of the best things we can do to develop our movement musicality.) Our physical connection — which does share varying levels of weight and resistance according to the needs of the dance — is the 1 + 1 > 2 of our partner dance.
Try this experiment. Hold a hand in the air, as if it is part of the hand side of an embrace. No partner weight or resistance, it’s all you. No one pulling or pushing our hand up, down, or sideways. How does that feel? (Disconnected!) How long does it feel comfortable? Now with your hand in the same relative position to your body, rest it against a wall or other fixed surface. No weight on your hand. No pushing, pulling, or lifting. A purely neutral surface, and yet . . .
Words of prohibition create confusion and difficulties for beginners. Instead, we want to be giving dancers exercises to help their bodies calibrate clear and comfortable levels of connection: resistance and weight.
If we can’t feel our partner’s weight, we can’t know where their weight is on the floor, and which is their free leg. If we feel no resistance, our base is only the distance between our own moving legs, not the combined, longer, more stable base of the two of us moving together.
We act against gravity and against surfaces to help move ourselves, move objects, and interact with the physical world. Compare this to life in a Space Station with no gravity, where one can’t even move from place to place without interacting with surfaces (or expelling breath against air resistance).
I understand what teachers attempt to convey with admonishments to be “independent” dancers, not using our partner. Yes, we want to use our own muscles and power to hold our arms up and move across the floor. And! When we combine that with another self-powered person, working together we can achieve more than independently.
We do want to use our partner. We don’t want to abuse or misuse our partner.
That’s the problem with edicts and prohibitions. “You must do X; you can’t do Y.” No. Everything is a Range of Possibilities. By recognizing and exploring the various ranges, we come to calibrate what is Clear and Comfortable FOR A GIVEN CONTEXT.
Taking up an embrace at the beginning of a song: we have practically zero resistance and weight; there’s no need. At the other end of the range, moving in a fast, big, or dramatic way, there is significant resistance and weight sharing.
Let’s not just talk about it; let’s explore it as a way to better experience, understand, and use the range of possibilities. Check out the Tango Tribe explorations (No ads, No cost, No spam).
The Game of Argentine Tango complete lessons
Videos with captions in English and Spanish, written summaries, extensive cross-references, and an AI agent to answer questions.
The 01. Fundamentals section covers connection and presence. It starts with Warmup every day.
The YouTube Game of Tango videos
Refreshed videos from the game, edited for brevity and clarity, with helpful on-screen callouts.
01. Fundamentals playlist on YouTube.